Well, as promised we headed out today to try something different. We tried, we failed, we laughed! (After, it was over). Thank God there are no pictures, that we know of,) But I get ahead of myself.

Our Saturday mornings started out just fine. I slept in a little, but decided I had to walk today. My scale has crept up a pound everyday, so even though it was later than usual, I went.

Then it was off for another breakfast at The Good Egg, and to pick up the rental car. Now I’ll let Jen tell you about the car experience. After we got started we headed to Mesa to go tubing down the Salt River. Now here is where it gets interesting.

When, Jenn was telling me some of the things she wanted to do at the Grand Canyon, she mentioned White Water Rafting.  I laughed and said, yeah right, I don’t know if we are up to that”.  So I figured, instead we would go tubing here in Phoenix at the Salt River.  It is a popular summer activity that many people do here.  So I asked around got some pointers from people, looked up the web site, read everything on it, and even called.  Weeeelllllll . . . . .

We head up there, with our cooler, sunscreen, snacks, camera etc., and 2 sheets.  I had been told to bring an old sheet to throw over the inner tube because they are black and the sun makes them too hot to touch.  Probably the best thing we did, those sheets saved our life.  I was a little apprehensive, for one I have never been, so I’m not crazy about taking people places that I haven’t tried out.  Two, so many people come back really sunburned, because you’re on the water and you really can’t get off, just because you are uncomfortable.  Three, though drinking is one of the big past times there, the sun and alcohol do not go good with people being smart.  But anyway, we get there – I’m wondering how we are suppose to take this cooler with us on the inner tube, and how do you keep your other stuff dry.  But there are people with really big coolers, ones on wheels and all kinds of stuff, so I figure there must be a way.

When we get to the counter, I tell the girl, we have never done this and how are we suppose to navigate this cooler and our stuff.  She says “Oh, your cooler is small, you’ll be fine.  Here let me show you, and she gets in a tube and says “Just put the cooler in next to you and it will stay there.”  Hmmmm, I think – *( side eye.)  But okay, she suggest we leave our cell phone, money etc in the car.  There is nothing up there to buy.  So, we get our tubes,  I take our stuff back to the car.  We tie the car key onto my swimming suit top and all we have in a bag they provide is our sunscreen and my old sneakers that I’m planning to put on.  (Oh, because she says that when we get to the end, we need to paddle our tube over to the edge to get out in plenty of time, otherwise you will float further down the river a few miles and have to walk back, and that it is rocky there and the current is kind of strong.)

Hind sight is 20/20.  Really at that point we should have asked for a refund, got in our car and headed to the nearest bar.  That would have been more our speed.  But no, we discuss our apprehensions and move on.  We get on the bus.  Ride to the top, but tell the bus driver we want the lower point, which is only a 2 hour float and not 4 hrs.  (We knew that would be too much).

Well, we get off the bus and head down a hill to the waters edge.  At this point we both have on flip flops.  The sand that is popping up on our feet is really hot and we comment on that.  Then we get to the water,  spread our sheets, try to move away from the edge.  With some struggle and a litte help from some kids on the beach (thank God you weren’t there to see that)  we get in.  We’re floating, somewhat, and somewhere.  Evidently straight for a tree.  (Now what is that darn tree doing in the water in the first place).  A man warns Jenn, which I don’t hear, nor do I see the tree yet.  I’ve just got in my tube good.  Jenn jumps out, and as I’m floating by she says “Pat watch out there’s a Tree!  So, I scramble out of my tube, in time to miss the tree, but am now on the other side of the tree, standing up in knee high water, with a current, that I realize is pretty strong.  The rocks are large and slippery, and I’m wishing I had my sneakers on which are in the bag that Jenn has.  At that point I see one of my flip flops floating down the river.  My left one is broken and not helping me at all with my current dilemma.  How to get the heck out of this water! ! !

I look for Jen, who I don’t see.  That darn tree is blocking my view.  But I try to ease my way to the river bank, with no shoes, rocks, and hold on to the hugh inner tube and my cooler.  I see Jen, she is on the shore, and I’m still inching my way to the edge, thinking I’m sure glad I brought those sneakers.  When I get to the edge, I ask, “Do you have the bag?’  Jenn says, “no I couldn’t hold on to that, “. 

So at that point there is no discussion between us as to whether or not we are trying this again.  We just telepathically know, that we are going home.  But between us and the bus is about 400 ft of hot sand, and we have 1 shoe between us.  Well thank God for those sheets, which we have managed to hang on to.  Jen, starts out with 1 shoe and sliding her bare foot along on the sheet.  I can’t quite do that because I would need 2 feet on the sheet, and I’m not that coordinated.  So I have to run over this hot sand from one shady spot to another.  We are taking a zig zag route to the bus stop trying to find shade, and the shortest distance through sunny spot.  Well, that sand was so darn hot, my feet were burning so bad and at each shady rest area, I just wanted to cry and curse. 

At some point, I get something stuck in my foot.  I do pull it out and so now I”m bleeding as well.  In between sunny areas, I am taking water and ice out of the cooler and trying to pour it on my burning feet, just so I can get the courage to take the next step.  At some point we are near the stop.  Jenn is at the top of  the hill, and we just want to be done with this.  So I take the plunge, and run up the hot sandy hill over the equally hot asphalt and jump on the bus.

We get back to turn in our tubes and the girl says you went from point 2 to 4.  I say, we didn’t go anywhere, we got in the water, got out, went to the bus, and came back.  (You should have seen the look on her face).

We slide across the parking lot on our sheets, get in the car, turn on the air, and try to drink water.  It is at this point, as we are driving away, that we realize that in our clever preparation, we froze the water so that it would stay cold, and it hasn’t melted enough to quench our thrist.  We bust out laughing, realizing that we are out in the middle of the desert, with frozen water, trying to float down a river with no shoes, and the hilarity of the situation just got the best of us and we laugh until we cry. 

Once back in civilization, we see a Walgreens, and I say we can get some flip flops.  My Diva says, “we can’t go in we don’t have any shoes on.”  I tell her I don’t give a damn.  Of course she sits in the car, I get shoes and water.  We laugh some more, and then did what true Diva’s do.  We went to DSW and bought real shoes.

Well, read Jen’s for the rest of the evening, and lots of pictures.

We certainly tripped the light fantastic today.  We laughed until we cried.  We survived!  Be sure to keep up, we head for the Grand Canyon next week.

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